The Real Spiritual Practice Begins When Life Gets Messy

There were dishes in the sink, laundry waiting, messages coming in, and a nine-month-old on my lap who was determined to get her hands on my phone.

And there it was. That familiar thought.

I don’t have enough time.

Have you ever noticed how quickly life can swallow you up?

One minute you’re going about your day, and the next you’re mentally juggling a dozen responsibilities, thinking about everything that needs to get done and wondering how on earth you’re going to find the time.

I love the life I’ve created. I’m grateful for my family, my work, and the opportunities I have to do things that matter to me.

And sometimes, I’m completely overwhelmed by all of it.

I think this is something we need to talk about more in the spiritual world, because spirituality in everyday life rarely looks as peaceful as we might imagine.

Because what does a spiritual life actually look like when you’re living one?

The Little i and the Bigger I

It’s remarkable how much power a single thought can have when we allow it to take up residence in our minds.

For me, the thought I don’t have enough time can create a sinking feeling. Suddenly, everything that needs my attention feels heavier.

But I’ve learned to recognize that moment, pause, and consciously shift my perspective.

I call it coming back to my center.

You see, I believe there’s a little i and a bigger I.

The little i is our programmed personality, navigating this matrix reality through its conditioning, responsibilities, expectations, and perceived limitations.

The bigger I is our eternal higher self, existing both within and beyond this physical reality.

We experience the world through our human personality. It has a history, a collection of beliefs, emotional responses, habits, and ideas about what’s possible.

Many of these patterns were established long before we were consciously aware of them.

And when life becomes demanding, it’s easy to get caught up in that smaller perspective.

We begin seeing everything through the lens of whatever is troubling us at that moment.

A stressful conversation can become a terrible day.

An overwhelming to-do list can become a life that feels impossible to manage.

A temporary setback can become evidence that we’re falling behind.

The circumstances may be relatively small in the context of our entire lives, but our attention gives them enormous power.

That’s why awareness matters so much.

The Spiritual Practice of Everyday Life

There’s a misconception in the spiritual world that as we raise our awareness, life should become effortless.

Everything should flow. We should remain peaceful, centered, and completely unbothered by the circumstances around us.

And if we experience overwhelm, frustration, or fear, perhaps we’re doing something wrong.

I don’t believe that.

We’re living human lives.

We have families, responsibilities, relationships, businesses, bills, and unexpected circumstances that require our attention.

Some days are beautiful. Some days are exhausting. Often, they’re both.

Meditation, breathwork, and spiritual rituals are valuable practices. I use and teach many of them.

But I’ve come to believe that some of our most meaningful spiritual work happens outside those dedicated moments.

What happens when things don’t go according to plan?

When we’re stretched thin?

When the proverbial shit hits the fan?

That’s where we have the opportunity to practice everything we’ve learned.

Recognizing our patterns, becoming aware of our reactions, and consciously choosing how we respond are all part of self-mastery. And the more we practice, the more naturally that awareness becomes part of how we live.

Can we recognize when an old pattern is running?

Can we notice when our thoughts are creating unnecessary suffering?

Can we interrupt a familiar reaction and choose a different response?

Can we remember who we are beyond whatever is demanding our attention?

These are the moments when our spiritual awareness becomes something we actually live.

Coming Back to My Center

When I notice myself getting caught up in that smaller perspective, I make a conscious decision to zoom out.

I remember how grateful I am for the life I’ve created, how much work it took to get here, and what actually matters.

I remind myself that I have choices.

I may not be able to control every circumstance, but I can choose where I place my attention and how I respond.

Then I write things down, decide what deserves my attention, and take one small step forward.

The circumstances haven’t magically changed, but my perspective has.

Suddenly, I’m swimming again.

And here’s something I’ve noticed: the more often I practice returning to my center, the easier it becomes to recognize when I’ve wandered away from it.

The thought still comes.

The responsibilities still exist.

But I don’t have to follow every thought into the emotional experience it offers me.

That realization is powerful.

A Simple Practice for Returning to Your Center

The next time life feels like too much, try this four-step process.

1. Recognize

Notice the thought or feeling that’s pulling you into overwhelm.

What are you telling yourself about the situation?

Sometimes simply identifying the thought is enough to create a little distance from it.

2. Pause

Give yourself a moment to go within rather than continuing to follow that thought.

Take a breath. Become aware of what you’re experiencing.

You don’t have to solve everything in that moment.

3. Zoom out

Remember the bigger picture.

What actually matters? What are you grateful for? Are you seeing your whole life, or only what’s demanding your attention right now?

Consider what the bigger I might see that the little i has temporarily forgotten.

4. Take one step

Write down what’s on your mind, prioritize what matters, and do one small thing to move forward.

You don’t have to get everything done today.

Sometimes a single intentional action is enough to interrupt the feeling of being stuck.

Spirituality Is Something We Live

I think one of the greatest opportunities we have is to bring our spiritual awareness into the ordinary moments of our lives.

Into our conversations.

Our parenting.

Our relationships.

Our work.

The way we handle pressure, disappointment, uncertainty, and competing demands.

The way we speak to ourselves when things aren’t going according to plan.

It’s easy to feel connected to something greater when we’re sitting in a peaceful room with our eyes closed.

The more interesting question is whether we can maintain that awareness when the room is noisy, the laundry is piling up, and someone needs us for the fifteenth time that morning.

That’s the practice.

And feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’ve failed at it.

Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is remember who you are beyond the demands of the moment.

Then choose how you want to move forward.

What good is our spirituality if we can’t use it in our actual lives?

That’s the question I keep coming back to.

And it’s one I think is worth asking.